We have reached the time of harvest. The full harvest moon in Pieces has just passed and the autumn equinox is fast approaching. Things are really feeling intense for me, as I’m sure they are for many people. Saturn is in my home sign of Capricorn and still in alignment with Pluto and both are coming out of retrograde and going forward, which I thought was going to be a good time for me, and I’m sure it will be but I’m not seeing it yet. I’m still surrounded in WHAT THE FUCKS from the past few days. I may be a spiritual leader but I’m certainly real and human.
I have been researching a lot about my family lately so that I can piece together things that happened in a “factual” way. The problem is that everyone has different information. To me this is evidence of colliding timelines but for most people they just believe the information that they have is truth. It really makes me wonder what truth really is. I have always believed that truth is up to the individual and that has become very apparent especially in the past few days. Truth to me right now is that I am either smashing myself with obstacles to my path or my path is seriously changing again this fall, which seems to be the case every fall.
Change is the only constant in my life really and it really feels like the biggest changes happen in September of every year, the biggest ones being my mom’s death and my boyfriend Mike Potter’s death, also in September. This year I was determined to schedule something happy on the anniversary of his death. I took the chance and scheduled a metaphysical fair for a church I’m involved with to raise money for their roof. I was hoping scheduling such a happy event over such a tragic anniversary would change the vibration of the day for me. I’m not big on anniversaries but I’m blindsided by them sometimes when something happens and I think back on what day it is exactly and realize it is the anniversary of something.
Looking at all this research I have discovered that there has been a lot of family loss in September. I’m wondering if that is because harvest time is kind of like reaching the 9 in tarot. Time to fulfill the circle of life in all aspects perhaps?
I always look at life now as an adventure but sometimes I am not sure which direction to take and I feel like obstacles keep being inserted in it so that I can see which way I am meant to go. The question is…are those obstacles being put there by a power higher than me to steer me in a particular direction or am I attracting obstacles out of fear of major success? How would you answer that question in your life?